On the surface, Greater Des Moines seems like a fairly straightforward place. A place where people dream of selling more insurance and hope to be mistaken for someone who lives on a coast. Any coast.

But when you stop and think about the details, you start to wonder:

If Don Lamberti, retired chairman of Casey’s General Stores Inc., owns 2.7 million shares of Casey’s stock worth $49 million, and the annual report says the company is worried because an increase in the minimum wage “may have a significant impact on the Company’s operating results,” does that mean that capitalism is working out just fine?

That woman I saw posing for a photograph last fall in front of the topless lady statue south of the Capitol – when the prints came back, did she regret not showing at least a little skin?

Those ramps on the redesigned freeway, where exiting vehicles stream through entering vehicles like shotgun pellets through a gaggle of Canada geese – would those be good locations for tow trucks and stacks of accident report forms?

If you built a walking path that was nowhere near a river or lake, would people not understand how to use it? What is about natural bodies of water that draws us – the alluring smell of fish and rotting vegetation or the ample supply of mosquitoes?

Those guys playing chess on the sidewalk over by the Drake University campus the other day – what do they think this is, New York? As Iowans, they should have been sweeping or raking.

If we lose our first-in-the-nation caucus status, and we don’t have to prepare for candidates’ photo ops anymore, can my daughter have all of those extra bales of hay for her cattle?

The Christmas lights that were glowing on an East Grand Avenue house on the morning of March 24 – was that in honor of the three-month anniversary of Christmas Eve, or was it a “first week of spring” celebration?

What happens if broadcast journalism schools run out of young, attractive, blonde women? Who will help our rapidly aging TV anchormen deliver the news?

If it’s true that 85 percent of the methamphetamine in Iowa is imported from elsewhere, what’s our next step? A really big wall? Or would some extremely stern signs do the trick?

Was it proper to put a Costco so close to the very fanciest retailers that we can drag, kicking and screaming, into Iowa? Or do prestige shoppers stop there and buy something in bulk so they can arrive home feeling thrifty?

That little room atop the tower at Terrace Hill – do you think the governor climbs up there at night with the lights off and goes through some sort of “Lord of all that I survey” routine? And does it involve a costume?

If thousands of downtown workers also become downtown residents, will they be walking home for lunch every day, making this feel like a small town? Should we start blowing a noon whistle? And is it too much to ask that they occasionally invite me over for a sandwich?