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My mother was a town clerk, handling various receipts and expenses, but I’m pretty sure she didn’t embezzle. If she did, I definitely should have had a bicycle with two speeds instead of just one.

If she didn’t, maybe it was just because embezzlement’s time hadn’t arrived yet. Civilization rolls on, and a recent list in The Des Moines Register made it clear that embezzlement has surpassed rail-car graffiti and stands right behind detasseling on Iowa’s list of popular activities.

For decades, we liked to think that you could leave a wallet stuffed with cash lying on the sidewalk of any small town in this state, with only one of your initials inside as identification, and the decent residents there would find a way to get it back to you. Along with a zucchini cake.

So this embezzlement phase is disappointing.

What happened? First, average Iowans started traveling internationally, even without being inducted into the military. Then they got cable television. Finally, subscriptions to The New Yorker.

All of this worldliness appears to have destroyed their character.

But it was a small step. Somebody once told me that cops have a saying: “Everybody lies; most people will steal if they think they can get away with it; and some guys will cut your throat just for the fun of it.”

Let’s skip the first category, hope that the fellows in the third category don’t show up for our high school reunions, and focus on the second one.

Being in charge of the money for a small town or an organization must be more temptation than we are wired to handle. If you give in, you have a couple of options: Take home a bit of cash here and there in a cautious, low-profile Iowa kind of way; or award yourself bonuses and raises, sprinkling in exotic vacations disguised as business trips.

It’s your choice, but note that the latter method does leave you with some pleasant memories for those long months in prison.

Although it’s especially disappointing to see Iowans succumb, it’s important to note that the whole country is hopping onto the embezzlement bandwagon.

For example, in St. Louis, Sherell Mitchell pleaded guilty to embezzling more than $110,000 from the Communications Workers Union, money she then fed into slot machines.

In Hickory, N.C., Holly Lafone Specht was accused of embezzling $3,000 from an elementary school’s Parent Teacher Organization fund-raisers. Maybe you can sink lower than that, but it would have to involve orphans.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not implying that it’s only women who embezzle. I’m saying it’s mostly women of about my age.

As 2010 got started, The New York Times reported that Sheila Dixon, 56, announced that she would step down as mayor of Baltimore. All she did was misappropriate about $500 in gift cards donated to the city for needy families when she was president of the City Council.

She agreed to give $45,000 to charity, but also got to keep her $84,000 annual pension. Is this punishment, or an excellent retirement plan?

Also in January, the Times reported on 58-year-old Melissa King. Walking on a much higher wire, she was charged with embezzling $42 million from the Laborers’ International Union of North America’s employee benefit funds over a span of seven years.

King should forfeit her membership in the American Embezzlers Association. Skimming $6 million a year isn’t skimming; it’s draining. A good rule of thumb is to restrict your take to no more than $5 million per year. Nobody’s going to notice that.

For business owners and organization executives, the lesson is not that you should avoid women, many of whom may be trustworthy. The lesson is, maybe you should pay a little more attention.

Also, to keep things in perspective, I should point out that men are far more likely than women to hold up a convenience store with a pistol. We’re just not patient enough to embezzle.