This semester I am teaching an undergraduate management course, and I found myself perplexed. Most students come into class 10-15 minutes early and open their laptops or only look at their cellphones. They rarely greet or even talk to one another. It is difficult to get them to engage or converse. In 30 years of college teaching, it was never this hard to get students to interact. Even though I have not been teaching full time for five years, something has changed.  

I kept thinking about Robert Putnam’s classic book “Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community.” He points out that in decades past, people joined bowling leagues for a sense of belonging. Now people seem to be less likely to join organized groups such as Rotary, PTA and mainline churches. Putnam concluded that Americans need to work harder at connecting with one another because a sense of community is critical to our well-being.

After hearing Terry Gross interview Sheryl Turkle on NPR about her books “Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other” and “Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age,” I bought both books and could not stop thinking about how technology was having a negative impact on our ability to build community in the workplace — college courses included. Turkle, an MIT professor, has been studying digital culture and communication for more than 30 years. Some of her conclusions:
•  We would rather text than talk.
•  We turn away from each other and toward our phones.
•  We are forever elsewhere — not mindful and present.
•  We have given up conversation for electronic connection.
•  We are “connected,” yet alone together.

Turkle’s research reinforces a 2006 study by Miller McPherson and Lynn Smith-Lovin that concluded our circle of close friends is shrinking. From 1985 to 2005, the number of people we can discuss “matters important to us” dropped nearly a third. The percentage of people who said they had no one to talk to about important matters more than doubled, to nearly 25 percent. “This change indicates something that’s not good for our society. Ties with a close network of people create a safety net. These ties also lead to civic engagement and local political action,” said Smith-Lovin. 

Based on research, the bottom line seems to be that people are lonelier now than in the past and use technology as a way to fill the void. But that same technology reinforces our loneliness.  People lack the skills and desire to have face-to-face conversations. They are uncomfortable with the silence needed for self-reflection. If this is true, how does this change what is needed from leaders in organizations and teachers at all levels?  

If leaders are aware of this loneliness, then they can do something about it. In a recent Harvard Business Review article titled “Workplaces That Move People,” Ben Waber, Jennifer Magnolfi and Greg Lindsay discovered through research that “face-to-face interactions are by far the most important activity in an office.” They advise “getting employees to ‘collide,’ because creating collisions — chance encounters and unplanned interactions between knowledge workers, both inside and outside the organization — improves performance.” They advocate designing workplaces that promote and facilitate collisions because of the enhanced productivity, creativity and satisfaction as a result of social interactions.  

What else can leaders do?

Actively listen to the cares and concerns of those who report to us and who work with us. We don’t have to have all of the answers. Sometimes people just need us to listen.

Build relationships by listening, because it is hard to trust someone you don’t know. Since trust is a reciprocal relationship, people are more likely to trust us if we trust them.  

Create a supportive culture that encourages reflection and silence. Remind employees to disconnect in order to connect.

There is much talk about the value of building community in the workplace, but the challenges are strong. Leaders have to push back.  

So after a few weeks, I told the students they could not open their laptops or look at their cellphones once class began. Although the results so far are not conclusive, the changes seem to have made class more interesting for all of us. I hope they learn that in the end, real face time matters more than Facebook.